but I couldn’t.
Some talk about faith like this: “You’ve got to move your faith south — from your head to your heart.”
My faith worked in reverse: I needed God to move my faith north. I had a heart that was willing, but a brain that was not. I wanted to believe, but I could not.
So rather than disappoint myself with stories that seemed like fairy tales, this Love Letter stayed shelved for years.
But the willing heart wins every time. The Word Himself planted Truth in hearts, under a canopy of forever. And the Word would grow in willing soil.
“He has set eternity in the hearts of men.” — Ecc. 3:11
Yes, He would make everything beautiful in its time.
One day, my oldest sister sent a gift by mail. It was a book like the one on my shelf — same words, same red letters. I opened it. The words of Mark 9:24 leapt from the page: “Lord, I do believe. Help me with my unbelief.”
I gasped, silently mouthed the words. Dare I ask this for myself?
God, if you’re there, could you do that for me? I asked. I want to believe, Lord, would you help me with my unbelief?
Lord help me with my unbelief!
I don’t know when it happened exactly, but my faith went north.
I began to feel the words, in the marrow. Leather-bound Soul Food in my hands — alive and active — had become more than stories. The Word put flesh on The Word. He wrote letters to me — to me! — and I wrote back to Him in the margins. I underlined my favorite parts in green.
Today, God is as close as gold-lined pages on my fingertips. When He says He loves me, I believe Him from my Word-drenched heart all the way up to my Word-drenched intellect.
Author and Giver of Life, Keep my heart pointed north. Kindle in me the desire to continually learn more about You through Your Word – a Love Letter to me that woos. Even when I fail — and I will again — remind me that it’s never too late to pick it up again; Your words are faithful even when I am not. Amen.