My mind played a mean trick on my again today. It made me think my past mistakes were bigger You. It’s crazy how that happens — how a woman who has surrendered at the cross, praised in the sanctuary, confessed with her mouth, and believed with all her heart — how that same woman can feel like a pit dweller again.
Yeah, it’s absurd.
And it’s got all the marks of a very real enemy, who jabs one long, bony, accusing finger to my chest. He reminds sinners-made-saints of our long and sorry record of bad deeds, horrid thoughts, squalid choices, and ugly messes. And the enemy reminds us how we still mess up. He whispers in our ear: “What will God think of you now?”
A woman — saved and forgiven — might believe the atrocious lies about who she is, rather than the truth about what You’ve rescued her from. How could we suddenly decide that, in this case, Your arm really is too short too save? That maybe we’re the exception to your scriptural rules governing grace?
Lord, I need pure gospel today. I need you to remind me of all the things that I already am: loved, approved, saved, forgiven, claimed, and redeemed.
And thanks be to God? You answer with the holy thunder of Truth. You won’t let us get away with bludgeoning ourselves with our own sin. You grant us Sunday sermons, loyal friends, well-timed phone calls, sunrises, and new mercies every morning to remind us that You are still God.
Sure, we’ve all fallen short of Your grace. And yes, we’re incapable of pulling ourselves back up again. But You? You justify freely by Your grace through the redemption that comes by way of Christ. Says so, right here in the Bible.
Lord, we believe. Help us with our unbelief.
Help us remember that we’re not defined by what has happened in our darkest hours, our darkest years, or in the darkest rooms. We’re not defined by the dark at all, but by the Light of You in the world. (In us.)
If any of us were the sum of experiences, we would be doomed. But out of Your sheer generosity, You offered a perfect answer for our imperfect lives.
This is the proof that you love us, and that you like us.
I go to Calvary today to reclaim it.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.