She wanted to be free. But she didn’t know how un-free she was until she saw her right hand. It was a fist, a clenched fist, a fist locked tight around the stuff she was scared to let go of.
But letting go seemed scary, like she’d lose control if she opened her hands.
And she was absolutely right about that: She would lose control if she opened her fist.
But she never had control in the first place. Control is a sham, and fists are a farce. The truth was this: The stuff in her hand had control over her. She knew it for sure on that night, years ago, when she found the words in her Bible:
“Is not this thing in my right hand a lie?”
She started to let go of the “things in her right hand,” and she thought she might have to keep letting go of them, all the way to glory. But she was willing.
And when her hand was empty? That’s when she felt it — the hand of Christ holding onto hers.
Peel our stubborn, white-knuckled fingers off of what we’re holding onto: the lies we tell ourselves … about ourselves; our fears over the future; our secret idols and addictions and past hurts. We hold tight to regret and worry and anticipated failure. Help us empty our hands so we can hold tight to the hand of Christ. Amen.